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Are you ready to have children?

Are you ready to have children?


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The decision to have children sometimes pairs couples. Psychologist Aslıhan Kurt from Anadolu Medical Center, couples should have the decision to have children together and be ready for a baby should be in agreement with the stating that you share with those who are curious.

It is an important factor in the decision to have children and the point of adjustment in marriage. Marriage and life do not change much, but when you have children, it is inevitable that there will be a change in marriage. Psychologist Aslıhan Kurt from Anadolu Medical Center He explains the change with a good example: en When you tango on a pair of tracks, imagine having a fluffy backpack on their back. Harmonious dance will be difficult. They will not be able to make some figures, they will develop a new set of movements, they will prefer more balanced movements instead of very acrobatic movements, in short, they will have to make some changes to adapt their dance according to this new situation. After these changes their dances will not be like their old dances, but they will still be harmonious in a new way. Once a decision is made to have children, nothing will be the same again. In this respect, it will be more important for the adaptation, rather than the fact that the couples know each other, how much they are willing and able to perceive the changes that will occur with each other. ”

Joint decision should be taken

There is no such thing as the gold standards that need to be considered when making a decision to have children. When these conditions are met, it is not possible to say that this is the best time to have children. Nevertheless, the same can be said for the decision to make a child, whatever it takes to make a healthy decision. Psychologist Aslıhan Kurt says: Il The first is that having a child will bring about significant changes in the couple's life. Couple's life, work, career, economic structure, social relations, job distribution, etc. awareness and realistic assessment of these changes will affect the accuracy of their decisions. The second is that this decision is a joint decision of two people. Couples' personal reasons for having children will not be the same. However, the decision must be the decision of two persons. Secondly, people should know the reasons for each other's decision to have children and report to each other. Third, the real reason for wanting to have children should be to want to have only one child. In some cases, it is seen that the decision to make children has unrealistic expectations such that the child will correct the relationship that is not going well, bring a change to the relationship and add excitement to the relationship. In this case, it would be more beneficial for the couple to be aware of these real causes, to evaluate them thoroughly and to find solutions if possible. After solving these problems, the child can reevaluate the decision to make. They should at least be aware of the secondary causes and be aware that they have decided to have children. Fourth, if one of the spouses has doubts or doubts about this decision, it should be discussed and discussed thoroughly. If a solution cannot be reached, it is useful for the couple to evaluate these decisions together with a professional (psychologist, family counselor, psychiatrist, etc.). Nevertheless, it is important to remember that, rather than the accuracy or inaccuracy of this decision, it is important for both people to be aware of the personal reasons on which they make this decision. Because it depends on the degree of their awareness of how effectively they will cope with the inevitable change in the couple's life in the future. ”


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